... Dio recounts an exchange involving Elagabalus along with the nicely-endowed Aurelius Zoticus: when Zoticus tackled the emperor as 'my lord,' Elagabalus responded, 'Really don't call me lord, I'm a lady.' Dio concludes his anecdote by having Elagabalus inquiring his medical professionals to offer him the equal of a lady's vagina via a surgical i